Episode 26: Two Most Important Lessons for Living the Life You Want


Episode 26: Two Most Important Lessons for Living the Life You Want

Friend, this is the season finale of The Chantiluke Podcast! (tears of joy and brief sadness).

Check out this episode and catch up on the 25 other episodes before I return in December.

In today's episode, I'm sharing the two most important lessons you need to know about creating the career and life you want.

You don't want to miss:

  • Why you only get a compass for your life, not GPS

  • How to focus on what truly matters as you make your wild, crazy dream a reality


Since I started Chantiluke, there are two important lessons I’ve learned about living a life that you truly want to live.

I’m tatooing these lessons to my forehead as constant reminder to stay focused on the things that truly matter.

  1. There is no how. You have to make it up.

  2. The experience is more important than the outcome.

Here’s what I mean.

Lesson 1: There is No “How”

There is absolutely no GPS for your life. The best you get is a compass. I was driving in my car the other day and this fantastic analogy for what I teach my clients (and myself) came to me. Stay with me here.

I love my Google Maps and Waze. When I’m going somewhere I go to all the time, sometimes, I’ll check on Waze for the fastest way to get there. And you know what’s so great about GPS: You put in where you are (really you don’t even need to type it in, it automatically “knows” where you are), you say where you want to go, and you’ve got turn by turn navigation. If you get off track, it’s alright. GPS re-routes you. It does all of the navigational work, you just need to follow the directions.

Wouldn’t it be great to have GPS for your life? Wouldn’t that be awesome? I just tell an app where I want to be, what I want my life to look like, and it guide me turn-by-turn to the thing that I want. I don’t have to do anything other than follow the instructions.

Well friend, doesn’t matter if it would be great. We don’t get it. It doesn’t exist.

The best that you get is a compass. You can’t plug in an exact destination in a compass. You can’t get turn by turn navigation with a compass. The best it will tell you is which way is North (or South or East. Depends on where you want to go).

What that means is you make up the best way you know how to go where you want to go. There is no “turn left in 250 ft.” Instead, you try going left and when the compass tells you “nope, now you’re going the wrong way” you correct course.

What is this compass, you ask? It’s your inner voice. It’s the quiet voice inside that gets lets us know when something seems exciting. Or when something is not serving us. It’s much quieter in comparison to the anxious voice inside. But our inner voice is much more wiser.

So, enjoy making it up as you go. Because that’s really where the joy is. Which brings me to my second lesson.


Lesson 2: The Experience is More Important than the Outcome

Funny little story: I was talking to this young man the other day and he just started college a few weeks ago. He shared that he’s majoring in Business because he wants to make money without working.

And I cried on the inside.

Who doesn’t want to sit, do nothing, and get loads of money for it. Sounds great!

But what that conversation reminded me is that I fall into the same trap myself. Of course I’d love a wildly successful business. But what that means is I will have to be radically uncomfortable frequently, I would have to have much more responsibility and autonomy than I’ve had before. And I LOVE it. That’s partly why I started a business.

You see, the experience you have is more important than the outcome you’re striving for. Not only may you never get the outcome you want, the outcome may not come when you want it. Or how you want it.

So what are you supposed to do in the meantime? Be miserable? Hopefully not.

If you’re enticed by a version of your life that seems incredible, but you have zero interest, zero desire to have the experience you must have in order to create said life, then you have a problem.

But if you are interested in the uncertainty but possibility of running your own business, or the frustrations but delight of creating a piece of art, or the solitude but immense self-intimacy of writing a book, then my friend, keep doing what you’re doing.

The outcome that you hope for is one moment. One single moment. But the millions of tiny moments that create that outcome, that’s where the magic happens. That’s where your life happens.

So even as you’re motivated to do incredible things, the doing, the being, the experiencing matters most.

There you have it. The two most important lessons I’ve learned on this leg of my journey.

I can’t wait to hear what lessons you learn.

Until next time, stay inspired.



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Danielle Callendar