Episode 41: Confidently Define Your Target Audience & Wow Your Customer

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Confidently Define Your Target Audience & Wow Your Customer

Episode 41

Today, I’m sharing a simple, but effective strategy, that will help you choose your niche, choose your ideal customer, and build trust in your business confidently.

You might know it’s important to narrow your businesses focus, but it’s easy to get distracted. Here’s how to stay focused on delighting your target niche, not everyone.


I know exactly what kind of business you want. You want a business that is lackluster, unremarkable. Aptly described as basic. Right?

No, that’s not what you want. Well then, you’re going to have do something to make your business remarkable.

To make your business the business that your ideal customer just cannot help but choose.

How? Well you choose your niche, you design your business for one person, not every person.

But to do so scares you? Don’t you need to be out here trying to serve everyone? Nope.

Today, I’m teaching you an analogy that will help you confidently choose your niche, choose your ideal customer, and build trust.

The analogy is the dinner party analogy.

First, I want to reiterate the importance of choosing a single person when you define your ideal customer, the critical importance of narrowing your niche.

When you try to accommodate everyone, you dilute your special sauce so much that it becomes tasteless. You are one person right now trying to create your business from scratch. You cannot be everything to everyone. And trying to is a waste of your precious energy, your precious time, and your precious gifts.

You will hear me say this many times over the course of the podcast, free trainings, paid trainings: narrow the person you are speaking to.

Your impulse is: “No, Danielle, I have to try to get as many people into my business as possible. I’m an unknown and unless I help anyone who comes across my business, then I will be out of business.”

Your other impulse will be do these exercises, name your ideal customer, narrow your niche and completely jump ship once you do the actual work of marketing. Your going to freak out because you feel like no one knows about you. So you’re going to abandon all the hard work you did to name your ideal client.

And both of these impulses are okay. They’re natural. If they do happen to you, no worries. It’s just like meditation, notice and gracefully bring yourself back.

I’m going to teach you one simple analogy, a philosophy really, that will help you remember that your business is remarkable, but only for a specific subset of people.

How Planning a Dinner Party is Exactly Like Choosing Your Ideal Customer

I want you to consider choosing your ideal customer, your niche the same way that you plan a dinner party. A dinner party usually consists of at the most 12 people. Even if you have the home of Lisa Vanderpump from RHOBH, even Lisa Vanderpump only invites 8 or 12 people to her dinner parties at a time. Dinner parties last anywhere between 2-4 hours. Dinner parties are distinctive because they are intimate and languid.

A dinner party host is responsible for making (or buying) the food, the drinks, setting the ambience. There is so much work involved in creating a warm, enjoyable atmosphere.

Now, what does this have to do with choosing your ideal client?

Let me tell you: You are creating a superb experience for a handful of people when you host a dinner party. You’re not creating a superb experience for your entire neighborhood. Block parties do not equal dinner parties. Creating a superb experience for other people is hard enough. One person is allergic to nuts, another person is on a Keto diet. But it is doable because you’re only talking about 6-12 people. You can choose a meal that accommodates people’s tastes and dietary needs and is still delicious for the majority of people there.

But you trying to cook for 20 people, 30, 50, 100? A dios mios. Just you? That’s insane. Nearly everyone will be disappointed. A small minority will be wowed by the meal. A bigger minority will be sorely disappointed in the food and never come to your home again. But the vast majority will be full but not wowed. And the next time your invite for a dinner party comes around they will think twice because their past experience was not memorable.

The lesson learned here is that astounding people is hard enough. But you can only astound in multiples if you are capable of astounding individuals.

When you host a dinner party you’re not just preparing food and drinks. You are also creating an enjoyable atmosphere. You have to actually enjoy the company of the people that you are sharing food, space, and time with. And your guests need to enjoy each others company. Remember, all of you are going to be in close quarters for a hot minute.

An enjoyable atmosphere at a dinner party involves good conversation and jokes. You don’t want arguments, you don’t want lulls in the conversation. So you choose who’s invited wisely. You cherry-pick who gets to attend your dinner party. You choose people who share values, interests, desires. You understand the people that you’re inviting as people, not a faceless mass who you’re trying to extract money from.

The same is true for your business. You have to understand and honor your customer’s desires, values, and interests. If they value very clear instructions and steps, then you sure as heck better give them instructions and steps. If your customer values convenience, do not give them something that is complicated just because you think it’s cool.

I’m learning more and more everyday that as an entrepreneur I have to earn the privilege of solving my customer’s problem. Here I was all arrogant like “All I got to do is make these things and if people have this problem, they’ll buy it.” No. Absolutely not. I have to earn that trust, I have to earn the privilege of coming through for someone. You know the same visceral reaction you have when a stranger does something like give you a free coffee? And your immediate reaction is like “What is wrong this coffee?! Is it laced with something?!” Maybe that’s my city-born, Philly-born cynicism kicking in. But I don’t think that reaction is wrong. I think that’s our brains evaluating whether or not this stranger has earned the privilege of your trust.

Ya’ll the same is true for your business. Nobody knows you. Unless you’re selling to a dear friend, colleague, or whatever, you are an absolute stranger. An absolute stranger trying to convince a stranger that you are trustworthy.

You can continue with the dinner party analogy: If a complete stranger texted you and said, “Hey so and so, I’m having 6 people at my house. I want you to come!” You’d be like “How the hell did this rando get my number and hell know I don’t want to be in your house so you can poison me and wear my skin.”

If your business is really remarkable, which you will make it remarkable, you have to earn the trust of the people you are inviting to show them that it is remarkable. You earn that privilege, it is not a right.

So, market, run, and create your business the same way you would run a dinner party. Choose your guests wisely, pamper your guests, and earn the privilege to have someone spend hours with you.

I made a cute little invitation that I want you to download, print out, and put in clear view to remind you that you not out here grabbing any and everyone to serve in your business. You are not out here hustling for attention from a crowd. No my dear, you are here creating a dazzling experience for a specific audience. You don’t hand out your invitation like hotcakes. You are select, astute, and gracious.

Because what you create is remarkable.

intro and outro music: danosongs.com

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Danielle Callendar